Dear PB Readers,

The most successful people I have met appreciate their specific weaknesses and find ways to accommodate them. In some cases they take lessons to become more proficient at the areas they are incompetent at. In some cases they evaluate the time it would take to become proficient and they hire or delegate those tasks to others who are already very skilled in the area. What differentiates the wise from the less wise is their ability to acknowledge their weaknesses and find concrete solutions to overcome them. One of the most valuable skills of a consultant is their ability to help you ask the right questions. "What will this project cost or how long will it take to complete?" For those of us who are novice in a specific area, we often don't even know what questions to even ask. A trained consultant can help us start that journey off on the right foot by providing us the right questions to ask and consider.

One of the things I have been doing for the better part of the last decade is sitting down with my own personal consultant to help plan out my life. While the industry calls skilled knowledge people consultants, I call this person a "MENTOR". In some meetings I actually call this person a "TORMENTOR" because her role in my life is to help keep me on track to reach the goals I had previously set. The initial stages of planning with your consultant (TORMENTOR) means them asking you the many questions required to better understand why you want to travel on the specific path you are considering. Do you fully understand the financial costs? Do you fully understand the human resource (time and skills) costs? Do you fully understand the opportunity costs (what you won't be able to do if you choose to focus your energy on this task(s))?

A great consultant / Tormentor is worth their value ten times over. My bright business friends tell me that one hour of pre-planning saves 8-10 hours of work once the project gets underway. With 2004 winding down, my Tormentor and I got together on Dec 31st to reflect on 2004 and evaluate the strategies for 2005. I value my relationship with my mentor not because I might not be able to do it myself but because a skilled consultant can ask just the right questions to make you either re-think your project or ensure that you start the journey off with at least one more resource in your toolkit than you likely would have on your own.

Fifteen to twenty years ago I used to believe the need for a mentor or consultant was a sign of personal weakness. Today I know that virtually every successful athlete / businessperson / artist or non-profit Executive director has identified one or two mentors in their own lives. Smart businesses have a group of mentors (known as their BOARD OF DIRECTORS). Smart coaches have a group of mentors (known as athletic directors or assistant coaches). Life is dynamic - and for many of you - your past personal mentors may have moved or passed away. Wise parents, uncles or university professors may no longer be in your life or accessible. If you are 100% satisfied with your life and the direction you are currently going (then don't mess with the right formula). If you sincerely feel a desire to change how your life is currently going but are not sure what to do next, why not consider a personal mentor / Tormentor for your life? Remember. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. With the passing of one year into the next, why not consider investing in yourself in 2005!

Our PB readers have come to us in waves over the past 221 weeks. A significant group began as readers when I was in Australia at the 2000 Sydney Olympic Games. After Sydney, many of you told one friend who signed up another friend and our weekly positive newsletter has grown immensely. Our PB readers range from 10 year old hockey players to 80 year old senior citizens who take care of the needy. Our one goal each week is to be a positive source of ideas and energy. I don't debate that there are many sad and negative realities in the world. There are also times when we need to focus our thoughts and energies on those negative problems (see a way to donate to the Asian Tsunami disaster). Our goal however is to be a consistent source of positive thought and energy. Welcome to 2005 and I hope you are as optimistic about the next year is as I am. Consider signing up your office mates, family or students for a free weekly newsletter sent directly to their house. Either sign-up on the PB website at www.personalbest.ca or email me directly at barrie@personalbest.ca. Enjoy the week!

JAN 3rd PB HIGHLIGHTS

* ARISTOTLE'S QUOTE ON EXCELLENCE
* IMPORTANT THINKING EARLY IN 2005
* PB EMAIL OF THE WEEK
* GET THEIR ATTENTION WITH WORDS OF PRAISE - BY GEORGE DICKSON
* HOW TO HELP THE ASIAN TSUNAMI DISASTER
* FREE JAN 7TH AQUAFINA MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKER SERIES TALK THIS FRIDAY
* JOIN BARRIE & C3 AT THE JAN 8TH MEGA DAY #1

ARISTOTLE QUOTE ON EXCELLENCE

"Excellence… is not an act, but a habit."

AN IMPORTANT WAY TO START 2005

Many of you have likely read this story in the past few years, but I believe it is an important message and mind-set to start the New Year:

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely, this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Take time this week to find out the name of your regular bus driver, dry cleaning lady or the cross guard who looks after the security of your kids/grandkids.

PB EMAIL OF THE WEEK

Thanks, Barrie, for an inspirational letter. I think your letter will look good hanging on our Christmas tree for our many friends to read and share in your Christmas spirit. Merry Christmas Barrie to you and yours. Bob/Rosemary/Selina/Wesley

GET THEIR ATTENTION WITH WORDS OF PRAISE

By George E. Dickson (Personal Best V.P):

How many times have you heard parents make this observation at a youth league game? "Back when I was a kid we didn't worry about parents interfering. We just picked up sides on the playground and played until dinner. Our Moms and Dads left us alone, and there weren't any coaches to bother you."

Kids today not only have a different outlook toward sports, they also have different expectations about how they should be treated. As a coach or a parent today, you need to develop new sensitivities if you want to communicate with your young athletes. Praise gets their attention. Whether the team you're coaching is composed of 6 year-olds or 12 year-olds always keep in mind that kids respond to praise. They look for it, they're nourished by it and, right or wrong, they expect it.

Get in the habit of giving out compliments to your players. If they have talent, praise their skills. If talent is lacking, praise their efforts. Trust me on this: The coaches who get the most from their athletes are those who praise as a standard motivational technique. If you feel you have to criticize an athlete, and you want him or her to listen to you, give what is called a "praise sandwich" that means offer a "slice of praise first" (Jimmy you're beginning to develop a great shot", but then a quick slice of constructive criticism (But, Jim, you really ought to pass to an open teammate more often), and finish with another positive ( And if you become as good at passing as you are at scoring, well, you'll have something special").

Yelling is not the same as coaching or teaching. The flip side of praise is openly criticizing young players by screaming at them. Sadly, this happens a lot during youth games, from both parents and coaches when they become frustrated by poor play. But the truth is that yelling is very a destructive process. It lowers self-confidence and self-esteem by embarrassing them; it tears apart the rapport and trust between the player and coach. It accomplishes nothing except letting the coach or parent blow off steam. In the dictionary to coach means to instruct, to encourage. It does not say to yell or scream.

Above all, avoid sarcastic comments. Sarcasm is the worst thing you can lay on your team. Although humor may be popular amongst the guys in an adult league, there is no place for it in youth sports. As a coach and parent please understand kids 5-12 don't understand the humor of sarcasm. "Billy, I've already explained this play to the team-now I'll repeat it slowly so you, too, can understand." Words like these can leave youngsters confused, angry, and unsure of themselves. As a coaching or parenting technique, sarcasm serves no purpose at all.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Many of George Dickson's observations work with older athletes, co-workers and family members. One of the benefits of a praise sandwich is there are no extra calories!

A WAY TO MAKE AN IMMEDIATE DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD

Dear Barrie. As you are aware the tsunami in Asia has devastated several countries. Currently, I am assisting the Sri Lankan Consul General in Toronto to gather relief supplies and funds to assist with this tragedy. Sri Lanka currently needs food, medicine, blankets, clothes, shoes, money, etc. Any help you can provide would be gratefully appreciated. I have published a website www.downtownto.com to help coordinate efforts. Please do not hesitate to call me if you have any questions about how you can assist. Cheers, Dilan

DON'T MISS THE FREE AQUAFINA SEMINAR THIS FRIDAY NIGHT

Now entering its second year, the free Aquafina Seminars are back. On Friday, January 7th join evening host Barrie Shepley at Robert F. Hall High School in Caledon with 75 year old World Champion runner Earl Fee. Earl is one of the world's finest track runners and he will share his knowledge and secrets of achieving your athletic and personal goals over the age of 40. Trust me Earl's secrets are just as valuable to the under 40 populations as well. Joining Earl will be 65+ Ironman Champions Dave Watts and Louise McGonigal. The cost is free, but you must reserve a seat by leaving names at the C3 office (email info@c3online.ca or call and leave your name at 905-838-2662. See you at 7pm Friday night. More details on the seminar location at www.c3online.ca

C3 MEGA DAY # 1

Once per month, our C3 team puts 50-75 people through a fun day of exercise. The day's format is a fun 9-12pm indoor bike on spin bikes or windtrainers with Greg Pace. Following lunch, Caron Shepley will put you through 75 minutes of power yoga and core strength/flexibility. Finally we will head to the local swimming pool for 90 minutes of swimming. Do any one, two or all three sessions (bike, yoga or swim) on Saturday Jan 8th. Details on how to register and how to get to the new location in Bolton are on the C3 website. Register today if you are interested. www.c3on.line.ca

TRY TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN AT LEAST ONE PERSON'S LIFE THIS WEEK!